Rep. Frederick Figures Out What Really Matters: Keeping the Poors from Buying Pop

Only two months into his tenure as a state representative, Ben Frederick (R-Owosso) has sorted through his priorities and found a cause he can really get behind:

Keeping poor people from buying pop.

Frederick ascribes to the same conspiracy theory as state Rep. Beau LaFave (R-Iron Mountain):

“There are a lot of people out there who are abusing the system. They go into their Walmart and buy a 12-pack of soda, go out into the parking lot, pour it on the ground and return it for the deposit. Instead of food benefits, that’s turned into a physical cash,” LaFave told the Detroit Free Press. “I don’t know what they’re using the money on. Maybe it’s heroin. Maybe it’s diapers. I don’t think the taxpayers should be paying for food benefits as a way to give cash subsidies to people.”

Rep. Frederick is the bill’s sole co-sponsor, indicating that the bill is too crazypants for even most Republicans in the state Legislature.

But a couple of things.

Where are these mass dumpings of sodypop taking place? Has anyone actually seen this, or is it just a story someone heard from their babysitter’s best friend’s cousin who has a neighbor who once worked at a grocery store and their former coworker knows someone else who said that maybe they saw this happen?

And what are they using it on? Heroin? Diapers? Same difference! Not to mention that’s a total crying shame that essentials like diapers are excluded from the Bridge Card.

And not to mention that the Bridge Card doesn’t solely exist for the poor people (who in some peoples’ minds  are only poor because of a lack of character). It also provides benefits to foster parents. But whatever, right? Why bother thinking about the likelihood of these rumors or who will be impacted when there are poor people to be shamed.

As always, the Republican Party is living up to their claim to being the party of small government. Small, right up to the point where they can exert their power over the poor, women, the LGBT community, immigrants or anyone else they think is beneath them.

Seriously. Ben Frederick. This is his priority.

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